OMG! This is my first lifestyle blog and I decided to do it on reasons why I could never ever be a guys side chick. Go ahead, grab your popcorn and all of your snacks because you’re in for one hell of a story. I can’t believe I’m letting you all into my personal life. Well, here it goes.

It seems like over the past 10 years of my life, I have been hearing women opening admitting to being someones side chick and of course, some are happy while others simply don’t give a damn. I’ve been hearing guys from all generations admitting to sleeping with other women who are not their significant others. Of course this makes me cringe every time I hear a low blow story like this from both men and women. Where is your self-esteem?

Four years ago I was talking to a guy who I found to be on my level. He was well groomed, nice, funny, had a career, he had goals in life, a purpose for living and to top everything off, he had his own house and a car. He was out going, which I love that about men my age because more men do not travel and if you know me then you know that I travel a lot. So to find a man that enjoys to travel as much as I do, boy oh boy, I think I have found my soulmate. (Laughs). —Only if you guys knew…[Fast forward 7 months after dating this dude]. I was sitting on my friends bed when her phone lit up and it was my guys picture on his phone. As a female I bugged out, like what in the hell do we have going on here? I snapped back to my friend and said “Why is he calling you? This is the guy I’m dating.” She told me he had hit her up on online and they were only friends. Even though she didn’t know him and I were talking to each other, I decided to not talk to the guy I was talking to and my now ex friend for a few years.

Several years have gone by and the guy I once liked contacted me on Twitter. I thing I found the funniest was his profile picture. His profile picture was of him and my now ex friend hugged up on the beach. (Laughs). I’m looking dead smack at his profile picture while reading his message “I miss you and want you back in my life.” The only thing I could say at this point is, are you serious? However, I wanted to see if we could pick up where we left off some years ago. I told him to meet me at Fridays to grab a few drinks.

So later on that week, we met at Fridays around the way. Over dinner we tossed a few drinks back, laughed and talked about life. You know, the norm. Life, romance, business and future plans! He started talking about his girlfriend (clears throat) and how he wasn’t happy. (Ladies, like we haven’t heard that before). He expressed that he was happy in the past, with me and wanted to feel that strong connection again. As a woman of course I started to get back into my feelings and started to go back down memory lane with him. As we ended the night sitting in front of the pond, he bent over and kissed me on my lips. I knew right then and there that the connection was no longer there. I quickly got up and walked to my car. Just like all of the love movies, he ran after me. I drove off saying “this isn’t right” as I sped away.

That night he called my cell at least 7 times. I didn’t answer. I kept asking myself, why did I go have dinner with him knowing he had a girlfriend? I felt guilty for the rest of the night. The following day he called me again and I finally answered. I told him that we don’t have the connection anymore and that we should no longer hang out or contact each other. He begged me to take those words back. I couldn’t because I knew what I stood for as a woman. I’m a woman with a vision, a solid purpose, a woman with integrity, a woman with standards and most of all, I’m a woman with morals. I could never allow myself to be weakened down by a guy by liking him so much that I throw my morals down the drain for especially for a temporary satisfaction. I was fortunate enough to grow up with both parents in the house. My father showed me what true love was. He taught me that being a mans second late night option was beneath me. A real men who has to have two picks has serious insecurity issues and I should never be with a man like that. My mother taught me to love myself and that no man is worth my dignity and that a lady should always have class, morals and standards. Together, my parents raised a true leader and a real queen.

You can’t love someone else if you never loved yourself first. I could never be a mans side chick. Not now. Not never.



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